My Story.

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Aug 7

The way you kissed me…

The way you kissed me today it was like we had never broken up. It was like we were still a couple. I am not exactly sure what we honestly are but your the only person im talking to. 

Aug 3

Done

There is a point where certain things set you over the edge

Aug 2

Country livin!

Aug 2

So precious!

Do I went on a late night run since it was sprinkling out.
Well when I left she was looking at a picture on the computer drawing me a tattoo.
She had her headphones in sketchbook in hand.
I kissed her and said goodbye.
Well I run for about a hour and a half.
I get back to the house go into my room take my running shoes and socks off.
I set all my stuff down,
Then I go into her room to check on her.
I find her asleep with her headphones still in sketchbook in her lap pencil in hand laptop on.
I turn of the computer take her headphones out of her ears.
I then take the sketchbook and put it up next to her laptop.
I take her pencils and I put them up.
I then turn her over a bit to pull the blanket out from under her.
I then slide her down a big put a pillow under her head,
I cover her up and tuck her into bed.
I kiss her on the forehead and knowing she is asleep, I whisper “I love you, I will always love you until death does us part.”
I then turn her light of crack her door and let her sleep.
I am head over heals in love with this girl.
She means absolutely everything to me!
I honestly hope one day I can marry this girl!

Aug 1

Loosing you…

The thought of loosing you has me terrified.
I don’t understand what is going on.
I can’t be there because your mom doesn’t think it’s a good idea.
All I want is to know your okay.
I am terrified.
I am scared.
I am sad.
I am angry at myself.
I feel like there is something I could have done.
Anything to prevent this.
Why.
I am scared to lose you forever.
I can’t bare the thought.
Idk what I would do.
How could I continue on.
I don’t want to think about this anymore.
I can’t stand thinking about you being gone forever.
My heart sinks I have a pit in my stomach. All I want to do is cry.
Why.
Please don’t go.
Don’t leave me in this world alone.
Your all that I have. Without you life is bare and empty.
Don’t do this. Please come hone…

Aug 1

Moments like these.

It’s moments like these were I just feel like I should go. I feel like O shouldn’t have came. I know all I want is you to be happy. But I feel like all its going to do is hurt me worse. Idk if I can handle heartbreak. Your my only true love. Your the one I wanna spend my life with but I don’t feel like it well ever honestly happen. Can you please just hurt me now get it over with. Or show me we well work. Why do I so this to my self?

Why hide it?

What does it matter what people think?

If they can’t except you and what makes you happy do you really need them?

I just want to be heard.

I want are love to be known.

I don’t want to be in the dark anymore.

i want to shout it from the rooftops.

I want it written on my heart.

I love you!

You are my heart and soul.

Why do we have to hide it?

You say you love me.

You kiss me like you love me.

I still hold you every night.

Why can’t you be mine?

I know I have fucked up.

But in the past month.

We have been perfect.

Everything is perfect…

Except the fact that no one knows.

Are we living a forbidden love?

What is this.

Is this what it feels like to be hidden.

Sad part is…

I rather feel hidden and feel like your ashamed.

Then to feel like I am forgotten.

I much rather be loved and hidden then lost and forgotten.

I love you.

I hope one day we can show the world.

But until then.

I will stay hidden in the shadows… 

Life.

Life is this thing we live. No one knows the true meaning of life. We all have are own special purpose. You live life and learn the meaning as you go. I have learned that so far my life has been to make a purpose in the world. I have made a difference in other people’s lives and it feels great!

Knowing she is down the hall sucks ass! I just want to climb into bed and cuddle with her.

Knowing she is down the hall sucks ass! I just want to climb into bed and cuddle with her.

Forbidden Love

I feel as if we are lost in a forbidden love. No matter what we seem to hide the fact we talk. i don’t speak up and say anything because I much rather feel hidden but still loved then lost in forgotten. You are my first and only true love. Yes I fucked up 3 years ago. Little do I probably even deserve this chance with you again. Little did I think I would ever have the chance too hold you in my arms. I never thought I would feel your lips on mine. I never thought in a thousand years that I would hear your voice say I love you. I thought i had been forgotten. I thought you had moved on and left. I never thought this day would come. Now that it has we are hidden. Are love stays in the shadows. I miss when everyone knew. I want to show you off to the world! I don’t care what anyone thinks. I want to be a known love. Hiding feeling in the shadows is killing me. I rather it kill me then be lost and forgotten…